An innominate entry on tea

Today after classes the teacher who is teaching me Mandarin came up to me and said "do you want to do dinner tonight?" me: "sure".  Her: "ok, about 5.  I call you."
In China this exchange could mean just about anything from not even happening to going out to a really expensive eatery, I had no idea what to expect.
She called me at 4:45 asking where I was. Apparently I was supposed to meet her at the gate so I went and met her and her daughter.  We went back to her place where there were a bunch of other people I was introduced to.  Most had a working knowledge of English with one having slighter better English since he is an English teacher.  He asked me about the word "expo".

The Chinese equivalent of duct tape.

They cooked up some great BBQ and I had lots of raw onions with some awesome sauce which I must now track down and buy for myself.  After this we spent a few hours around a very fancy tea setup.  One of the guys had taken a month long course to learn about teas and how to brew them properly.  He also had a very large book all about tea.  It was in Chinese but had English (or rather, Chinglish) translations.  I laughed a quite a few of them and wished I had brought my camera.  In the end I decided that many of you would enjoy this so I found a pencil and paper and wrote down a number of things.  All of the below I have typed exactly as they appeared in the book, there are no typos on my part.  The book is meant to be very serious. I hope you enjoy them:

"Although tea is innominate in our history, it is true that tea is our national drink."

"Drink tea in the open air, give your mood a holiday."

"Black Tea for winter
Black tea is a full fermented tea, which characterized by presenting a red color after brewing, it tastes sweet and has a warm nature, and rich in protein.  It has a function of refreshness, beneficial to thinking and releasing fatigue.  Chilliness is easy to injure health in winter, nevertheless, drinking this tea frequently can complement healthy internal environment, help digestion and strong our body."

"The 23 effects of tea:
detoxification
thirst heat
reducing fever
quench and helping produce saliva
reflesh oneself (ed note: in case you need new skin I guess)
improving eyesight
calming mind
sleeping less
eliminating phlegm
anti-dysentery
relaxing the bowels
diuresis
loosing weight
sobering up
relieving dyspepsia
prolonging life
anti-hunger
hemorrhoids and fistula treatment
curing the heartache
firming teeth
dispelling the wind and relieving exterior syndrome"

"Magic effects of tea:
dermatophytosis treatment
eliminating halitosis
hair care
alleviating symptom of a cold
tea pillow
driving out the mosquitoes
fertilizer for plants
detergent
remove odor
sterilization and diminish inflammation"


So after learning all this why would we do anything in life other than things relating to tea?
Happy tea drinking all!
Wiseguy1